The stork is visible flying across oceans, rivers, mountains, valleys and plains; over cities, towns and villages; past forests, orchards, farms and pastures carefully balancing the bundle in its beak. The cloth bundle shifts a little and the innocent face of its inmate becomes visible. It looks prepared to take on the world with its soft dimpled hands, sweet smile and twinkling eyes. Everything looks good. The stork seems to be on schedule. The baby looks healthy. It’s almost time. Any day now the stork will arrive with a bundle that will forever change your life. Having a baby entails a lot of changes. This is something every pregnant mother expects. Some changes are welcome while others may be unexpected. Expecting the unexpected can help prepare for what is to come. So here are 10 ways in which your life may change after becoming a mother.
10. Your identity
Earlier you were an individual and the society saw you as such. They saw your achievements, your capabilities, your attitude; they basically saw you the person. But now they see a maternal side to you. You are no longer a woman above any responsibilities but rather your identity is integrated with that of your baby. Your baby becomes an extension of you even if for a short while. Your pregnancy results in not just a new baby but also a new you!
9. Social life takes a backseat
If you thought you could go back to life as you knew it, once you deliver the baby, you can think again. Hanging out with friends, spending hours on the phone with your family, hanging back after work with your colleagues will soon become a distant memory. After spending all night dealing with a crying baby the last thing you want to do is socialize. Your friends and family are forever asking where you have been hiding. But there is a high likelihood you might not even be missing the old you!
8. Expenses increase tenfold
Baby products are exorbitantly priced. There are shops springing up everywhere solely devoted to baby care products and related services. These places are minting money, such is the market. So a new baby can be quite expensive. Earlier while your expenses revolved around your needs, now it centers on your baby. You practice extreme caution while making purchases and try your best to curtail expenses. There’s no more buying a cute pair of expensive shoes just because it catches your fancy. But not to worry, though the expenses you anticipated are validated it can sometimes take massive proportions in your head while in reality the expenses might not look so grim.
7. Time, a precious commodity
If you thought you would only be tight of cash with a baby around you might find yourself corrected. Time becomes the most precious commodity. Gone are the days when you couldn’t find something to fill your time. Now you are in a constant search for excess time to fit in all your activities! Before setting out involved grabbing your bag, but now you have to feed the baby, clean it, dress it up, pack for the trip…and I’m only just getting started. Every waking moment is consumed by 17 odd inches of your flesh and blood. But you don’t mind do you? You cherish every second you spend with your baby. You know this baby will soon grow up and all you want to do is hold on to every second of its life.
6. Your priorities
Earlier you may have put your career first or maybe even your friends or your hobbies. You may have had your sight set on achieving a lifelong dream and you probably even planned it down to a T, the race to that dream. You probably thought ‘prematurely’ that once you had your baby you could get on with your life. But suddenly you realize all your plans have gone awry. You have slowed down to a crawl and your priorities have shot out of order. Your world revolves around your baby at the moment and you feel everything else can wait! But don’t worry this doesn’t mean you have said goodbye to all your plans. It only means you have put your plans on hold for a while.
5. You become a child again
For the first couple of years there will be a lot of ‘goo goo’ and ‘gaa gaa’, yes I’m talking about baby talk. And it won’t just be your baby talking like that, even you will join in! You revisit your childhood spending time with your baby. You even become a child again! You enter this beautiful world of babies and look at things through their eyes. This happens to be one of the perks of becoming mother.
4. Your perspective of life
You remember how some dangerous stunt you saw on YouTube had you in splits, but now all you can think is how dangerous that seems! Or maybe you look at your mother and love her more and are able to empathize with how she felt when you were growing up. These are only some examples of what motherhood can do to you. Almost everything in life takes a new twist. It’s like after a rain shower everything looks fresh and everything looks new. Having a child can have the same impact on you. You worry more and are more anxious. At the same time you also see the beauty in everything. You look at the world and you see the world but with your baby in it!
3. Your responsibilities
Once you made decisions only for you and maybe at times for your husband too but now you suddenly find this helpless creature depending on you. It looks up to you and trusts you to make the right decisions for it. If the pressure isn’t already on you also realize that for the next two decades your baby will continue to be your accountability. You are responsible for nurturing and rearing and let’s not forget making a model citizen of your child.
2. Your relationship with your better half
The new bundle of joy can take up all your time leaving no time on your hands for your husband. Also sometimes when the pressure of having a baby takes its toll on your mental health, it could result in you taking it out on your better half. Bickering and fights might become a more common occurrence and the constant friction only widens the distance between the two. Also co-parenting may prove to be a whole new ball game. But despite all this a newer and stronger bond is forged between the two. You find yourself bonding over this tiny being that you created together – laughing at its adorable quirks, dreaming of its future, planning for its future together.
1. Perception of oneself
You are suddenly a mother. In the matter of just 9 months, you have undergone a major transformation. The changes are not just superficial either. There is something within you that has transformed permanently. One such change could be your perception of self. You discover this whole new you that you were completely unaware of. You love yourself more. You are suddenly so much more happier with yourself. You respect your body more. You find yourself taking better care of yourself if only for your child. You look in the mirror and see an altered version of you and I’m not just talking about the physical changes you see!
Becoming a mother can be magical. It can be an exhilarating and equally frustrating experience. For a mother-to-be the prospect of becoming a mother might be terrifying but not to worry, you’ll soon find yourself acclimatizing to all the changes taking place around you, it’s just a matter of time.