We are mere mortals looking for something infinite, a source greater than us that we can believe in. After all, we all want a hero who will set things right for us. A hero who helps us take the leap of faith and provides us with a bible for happy life. We have faith in everything else but ourselves. How is that going to work when we are the one living our lives? Here are 10 tips (I won’t call them easy because for some of us the mere thought of being happy with self is frightening) that can help you lead a content, satisfied and fulfilled life.
10) Do not overthink-
You might have read this for the umpteenth time. And you must be thinking that, “I did not sign up for this, tell me something new”. But before we get up and running we need to tie the shoe laces so as to not fall flat. This is the basic mantra if you want to go anywhere in life or do something. Re-evaluating decisions will only cause doubt and create problems that weren’t there in the first place. Let the past be and let the future unfold. Meanwhile, live a little.
9) Be grateful-
Count your blessings every day. This habit will remind you how fortunate you are. You will know that you are loved and you have something or someone worth living for. And soon enough you will realize that what you have is ‘Enough’ to make you happy. Now come on, get counting!
8) Learn to let go-
Negative thoughts, negative people, and unpleasant experiences, let them all go. Don’t be a captive in your own cage. Self-inflicted pain is never a good idea. Make space for better things that are to come. Re-visit the past if you must but don’t stay there, give what it takes to get rid of the pain. Sometimes, it takes more than just time; it is your willingness to heal.
7) Be yourself-
This does not mean that you be the ‘idea’ people have of you. Acting takes a lot more efforts than being natural. So be natural. Do not think about what people think of you, that’s their business and not yours. If you keep tailoring yourself for people then you won’t fit in your own self. And that’s a frustrating place to be in. We often read quotes about finding oneself, when the truth is to accept oneself. Learn to differentiate between the illusion created by people and the reality.
6) Set your goals and prioritize accordingly-
Set your goals, short term and long term goals. Goals will help you prioritize and give you a framework to function in. Most of the times it so happens that we want to do a lot of things and all at once as a result of which we end up achieving nothing. However unstable a mind is, if it gets a direction then it quits to waver. So take it slow and one at a time. Decide what is more important and plan accordingly.
5) ‘Free yourself’ from the mental blocks-
‘I can’t do that’, ‘you won’t be able to make it till the end’, ‘that’s not your cup of tea’, etc. All these thoughts limit you before you even start working on your goal. The blocks that others set for you reflect their shortcomings and not yours, so do not let people demotivate you. Do not give up without trying. Set your goals, not only the ones you think you can achieve but also the ones you want to achieve and work towards them. “Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will” – Suzy Kassem.
4) Manage your expenses-
It is proven that a ticket to the movies will cheer you up better than a pair of new shoes so choose wisely. Maintain a habit to write down your expenses every week so that you know where you spent your money. Prefer not to use plastic money (like credit cards) for purchases so that you can keep a tab on your expenses. Whenever you pay from your wallet it gets lighter. And that lightness will sink in sooner than the credit card bill that arrives at the end of every month.
3) Life is not a ‘sale’, so don’t settle-
The first and the basic rule of sale is to not purchase anything just because it is cheaper. What I mean to say is that sometimes we take the easy one or the available option. Just because it is easy or available does not mean it deserves to be in your life.Do not indulge in things or people just because they are available. That’s a complete waste of time and energy and you won’t get anything out of it. Make sure you really want something before you invest yourself in it. Be it your career, your partner, your friends. Do not stick around for long just out of the fear that you might not get anything better. If you don’t like it then get rid of it.
2) Express more Expect less
Express. It isn’t bad to let people know how you feel about them. Good or bad get it all out because if your feelings keep piling on then you might burst someday. A human incapable of expressing is termed a robot. All of us have trust issues but we don’t have to surrender to it. Let someone in. Be open to company. Confinement never leads to growth.
Expectations we say is a root cause of all evil. It is not bad to have expectations, it is a human nature. But having unrealistic expectations is like preparing yourself for a torture. You should know if the person you are expecting from cares enough to bother about your expectations.
1) Be open to experiences-
Do not let the feel of comfort that looks assuring to you take away the feeling of fresh air tickling your cheeks and playing with your hair. Go out there take a walk and face your fears. Don’t be afraid to try new things, to test your patience and to look for answers on your own. You won’t know more if you tread the same path everyday. Take a free fall once in a while.
So these are some basic mantras I choose to follow. They help me keep my calm in this otherwise insane world. The most important thing which is a part of all the above points is ‘your heart’. Follow your heart. It can be difficult sometimes for your heart is one irrational being but it knows what you want and what can make you happy. Don’t counter it with reasons.”Sweetheart you can’t go listening to every f***ing little voice that runs through your head, you will go nuts”- Samantha Jones, Sex and the City. Find a way to get what your heart desires. The feeling of content you will experience post it is unmatched.