Marriage is an institution which binds together two souls. It is pure and pristine. A successful and happy marriage takes a lot more than believing in Cupid or unconditional romance. Unfortunately, it has been observed that more than one-third of the marriages end up in a divorce, no matter how much we would like to want our marriage to last forever.
A long- lasting marriage needs commitment, a sufficient dose of love and affection and most importantly, good communication between the two persons. It is true that the initial spark is not a constant, and will fade away sooner or later, but it depends on you, and what all you can do to keep that fire burning. When two people tie the knot, they can’t expect life to sail through without any obstacles. They should be prepared to make emotional and financial commitments. There are going to be ups and downs, not once, but many times. Every couple goes through their happy times and hard times, and the way they escort each other during these hardships determines their true compatibility and the strength of their relationship.
Here are a few secrets to get through these tough spots and how to lead a successful married life:
Strong communication is a must
If you and your partner are able to talk freely and without any restraint, then you guys are going in the right direction. Poor communication is an indicator of a poor marriage. You and your partner should be able to talk to each about every thought, action or desire graciously, with full understanding and consideration. Both should appreciate each other. Never forget to apologize after unintentionally saying something bitter. Be aware of your partner’s moods and thoughts, and accordingly set the topic for the conversation. If either one of you is uncomfortable about talking about something, then the other person should be able to detect it from their body language and gather the courage to talk about it openly, without any hesitation. To improve, reading books or taking classes might help which will turn your marriage into a healthier and stronger one.
Respect each other
For a healthy relationship, one must treat the other as their equal. The other person should feel special and wanted. Keep reminding each other that you love each other and cultivate your relationship with sweet words. One person should not feel like his/her option does not matter, or that person is not being given importance, otherwise there are going to be discrepancies in the relationship. Listen to each other, greet one another and keep the affection alive. Respect and affection can break the deal and bring contentment in your marriage. Respect each other’s privacy, don’t go around checking each other’s mail or texts. Even after a bad day, don’t snap at each other, rather try to calm the other person.
Listen to your spouse
The one with good listening skills will always have an added advantage in any field. Listening to your partner can help in boosting their confidence and provides comfort. After a bad day at work, at least there is going to be someone who will listen to you, and understand your melancholy. Be considerate towards your spouse by paying attention to whatever that person says. Try to empathize and don’t zone that person out. Making eye contact, asking questions, keeping away your gadgets and giving him/her your undivided attention will unquestionably increase your affection for each other, and keep your marriage safe and sound.
Compromise is the key
When you decide to get married, you already know that you have to give in a lot to keep up with this relationship and make it last long. Sacrifices and compromises are exceedingly crucial for a jovial and successful marriage. There will be times when you both will need to sit down and make some serious life changing decisions, and in such a situation, you both will need to be considerate towards each other, and not just selfishly think about yourself. Buying a house, looking for a huge investment, deciding upon the number of kids to have or financial predicaments, all these are serious topics which will bring a major change in your life as a family. Express your feelings and reach a common conclusion which will be impartial and just.
Surprise each other with small gifts
Who doesn’t like to come back home from a long and tiresome day with a surprise gift waiting for them near the doorstep? It will keep the romance going and add spice to the relationship. These little gifts and tokens of appreciation will make the moment special. These gifts need not be expensive but the thought is what that matters. Make it a special gift, something which your spouse had his/her eyes into for a long time. Getting gifts at occasions which automatically demand them are not as pleasing as the ones which are given unexpectedly. Your partner will feel special and these sweet memories will provide a strong base to your marriage.
Learn to live with each other’s families
When you get hitched, you also get into a relationship with your partner’s family. When you love someone, you need to make efforts to liking and understanding their background and family too. If it’s a particularly challenging one, then give your maximal effort. It’s not particularly important to be best of friends with them or show immense affection. Small gestures can do the trick. If you can turn your friends into mutual friends, then it will fortify your marriage and provide a strong support system. Try to integrate both of your families and enjoy the perks of living with one huge family, with loads of people to trust and have faith in.
A smile can do wonders
A smile can actually bind your marriage and make it stronger. You want your partner to know that his/her presence makes you happy. A reassuring smile is all that is needed. Your warm and welcoming smile will surely melt your mate’s heart. It requires no effort and lifts their spirits. A smile describes a thousand words and speaks a lot about your feelings for your partner.
Give priority to your partner and spend quality time
With your busy schedule, balancing work and home, you are likely to forget to spend quality time with your spouse. You should prioritize your spouse, whenever taking decisions. Though you might not think about your partner all day, but never forget about his/her needs and wants. Honor their decisions and try for options which best suits you both as a couple.
Don’t let the romance fade away
Those three special words can be a monstrous mood changer. Simply looking at your partner’s eyes and saying ‘I love you’ like you mean it, will give a boost to your relationship. Start your day with an affectionate and warm hug or a kiss, which can set the right mood for the day. Even if you are not a romantic, try to maintain that spark in your marriage, do something which will show how much you desire him/her. Small kisses, hugs, cuddles while watching a romantic comedy can help. Don’t forget about those special date nights or romantic candle light dinners.
An impromptu weekend road trip, trying some adventure sport, deciding to keep a pet or taking a leave from work, along with many other things brings freshness and excitement to your marriage. By doing fun things together like exercising, playing a sport, going on long walks, will let you spend more time together, which is all that’s needed. Enjoying each other’s company will add a meaningful dimension to your marriage
No one prepares you when you enter this new phase of your life. Marriage is hard, but you need to make your way through it, make the most of it, and have a thriving married life!